A sneak peek at the Oracle and Sun marketing messages that got dumped.
On Jan. 27, 2010, Oracle finally finished off the acquisition of Sun Microsystems, scooping up all of Sun’s wares and business lines: adding “servers, storage, SPARC processors, the Solaris operating system, Java, and the MySQL database to Oracle’s portfolio of database, middleware, and business applications,” notes Oracle’s announcement.
The purchase was reminiscent of Oracle’s hostile takeover of ERP vendor PeopleSoft, which began in 2003, finalized in 2005 and kicked off Oracle’s acquisition spending spree.
The acrimonious dust has finally settled and all of Sun’s people are happily (cough cough) ensconced under the Oracle logo. Now that the new, combined marketing materials have been unveiled—for instance: “Software. Hardware. Complete.”—it might be insightful to look at the rejected slogans (obtained* by CIO.com) that never saw the light of day. Here are 10:
“There’ll Be No One to Stop Us This Time…Not Even IBM!”
The Free Ride Is Over
One Stack, Two Stack, Red Stack, You Stack
Hey European Union Commission….Screw You!!
The Schwartz Will Not Be with You
It’s Raining, It’s Pouring, Snoracle Is Boring
You’ll Pay for This
Sun Customers, Why Ask Why: ‘Cuz Larry Says So
Stacking the Deck Against You
Sun Was Losing $100 Million a Month…Not Anymore
[*I made these up, in case you didn’t know that already.]
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